To the Girl Ruled By Anxiety
Have you ever woken up and literally everything just feels wrong?
This morning I woke up with a crap ton of anxiety about everything that could possibly go wrong. Over breakfast, I felt nauseous as I worried. The enemy took my heart captive and held it tight, whispering lies into my ear about all the ways my wedding could be a disaster, all the decisions I could have made differently, and more. I sat and wondered if Matt really knows the crazy he's about to marry into.
It worsened as I stood on the shower with nothing but the tile wall to distract me. I stood there in solitude as every worry I could possibly have taunted me to bow down to it. I tried to pray but my head was so clouded and full of chaos that I gave up. I was so stuck in my head that I thought I'd go insane. I shut off the water, grabbed my towel, had a good cry, put my big girl pants on, and started on my work for the day.
But after a few hours I had to stop. I had to get out of my world and into the Word. I had to meet with Jesus because no amount of coffee or distraction was going to fix this one.
As I sat there reading about idolatry 1 Corinthians 10, I began to realize that the words WORLD and WORRY start off the same way, with the same root word or something. It's like they're destined to go together.
THIS WORLD MAKES ME WORRY. And until I intentionally yank myself out of it and say NO to every single thing that begs me to worship it, I'm going to worry. And so will you.
Because by nature we are worshippers. We all worship something. And worship of worldly things always turns into worry because deep down we know that there is no security there. But worship of the Father turns worry into FREEDOM because only there is where we find true security.
So if you feel consumed by worry or anxiety, take a peek at what's sitting on the throne of your heart. You'll probably find something in the world.
Dethrone the world and replace it with His Word.
Because joy is rooted in the WORD OVER THE WORLD.